Trip to the Dominican Republic!

My Sister and Darrin planned a fun weekend getaway to Punta Cana for Darrin's 30th birthday and had an extra room in their villa so they invited us. We thought it would be one of our last chances to travel/take a vacation before the baby comes so we took them up on their offer and we are so glad we did. We flew into Santa Domingo so we could see their house and how they live, which was important to me. It was so neat seeing the "Dominican way of life" that my sister and her family are accustomed to.

We went to dinner the first night we were there and afterwards the guys shared a few Presidentes (popular beer in Dominican) while the girls did a little shopping around the mall. I was impressed from day one with both Erin and Darrin's ability to speak and understand Spanish. At the restaurant Darrin so easily communicated our order completely in Spanish, saying even specific details of the order like that two people were going to share this item or bring Reagan's out first, etc. So neat! Then when my sister and I were shopping, she had no problem asking the lady in Spanish for a certain size or for a dressing room. I should have known my sister would master that first - all the shopping terms!  Anyways, it was very cool. For the remainder of the trip, if I needed a translator, I just turned to them and they pulled it off with ease.

Anyways, on to Punta Cana. We drove there - yikes what a drive. It was probably the least enjoyable thing of our whole trip but once we got there, boy was it worth it! The first night we went to a nice dinner at a really neat restaurant called Jellyfish where we celebrated Darrin's birthday. It was not in town and kind of tucked away on the beach so we would not have known about it had it not been for someone recommending it to us. The atmosphere and location were beautiful and the food was definitely not a let down. It was just overall such a great dining experience.

The Hard Rock hotel and resort was where we spent most of our time. The beach was beautiful and the resort was like a dream. We did a lot of lounging by and playing in the pool. The guys appreciated and took full advantage of the swim up bar. Us girls treated ourselves to pedicures at the spa one day. On the last day the guys did a zip line excursion and the rest of us went to the beach out in front of the villa. Grayson being so young didn't get to spend much time outside so we wanted to give him a chance to play in the sand.

Grayson has gotten so big and is like a big sack of potatoes when you hold him. His face just lights up when you look at him. He is so drawn to everyone around him and loves to be played with. Forrest called him Fred (flinstone) the whole time because his feet are so big. My favorite thing is this toy he sits in where he can roam all about the house. It was just so cute to see him run from one end to the other and turn around to see him when you didn't expect it. Reagan is at such a fun age. She is so shy but once she opens up, she is such a talker. She does the cutest things and you can tell she wants to be just like the girls. If me and Sister had on a hat, she wanted to wear hers. If we had our shades on, she made sure to put hers on too. She would randomly just say "Mae Mae, can I have some lip gloss?" She also asked me "Mae Mae, why aren't your nails painted?" My sister said she has even started to ask her, "Reagan is this outfit cute?" and Reagan already gives her an honest answer, "No that's not cute Mommy." Her and Grayson's personalities are definitely different, and almost opposite. Grayson is so laid back just like his Daddy and Reagan well, you know she is like Erin. :)

Overall it was a great trip! Lots of memories were made. I am so grateful for the time Forrest and I had together before the baby comes and am so thankful to get to spend time with my sister in the country that they will be living in for the next couple of years. As you can see, we got tons of pictures!

16 Weeks

16 weeks and headed to the Scarecrow Festival! That is if the rain slows down which I hate to wish for when we need it so bad. All day yesterday I was dreaming about the caramel apple and lemonade I was going to get and about purchasing a new Scentsy jar for the house. I had a lot of time to think about these things while waiting for Forrest to finish the Tough Mudder competition he did yesterday with some guys from his work. It was a definitely a day filled with dirt and mud, hints the name I guess. Even I just being a spectator was covered in dust! I definitely earned my festival treats today.

Tough Mudder

14 Weeks

I do not have much of an update from my last blog, but I thought I would at least mention we are officially over the first trimester. Whoop! Unfortunately, I welcomed the new trimester with a morning full of vomiting at work. It was quite miserable, but my fault. I think it was the big doughnut I ate at the beginning of the shift... sweets just sound so good but they do me wrong in the end.

I sported Aggie maroon all weekend starting with this tight shirt that I originally thought I might wear to the game and immediately thought heck no once I put it on. I did however think it was a good belly showing - one picture for blog, shirt. Speaking of the Aggies, I am not going to talk about that awfully disappointing game on Saturday, but I will mention I am excited they have announced they will be officially joining the SEC.

A couple other things I am excited about:
1.) Our fall calendar of events starting with our trip to Punta Cana with the Snider's at the end of October, finding out the sex of our baby November 1st, celebrating Forrest's 30th on the 5th, my Sis coming home in mid- November, and not to mention all the goodness that comes with every fall season for us like more Aggie football, the annual Scarecrow Festival, baking and spiced lattes, shopping, pumpkin patches and harvest decorating.
2.) This weather... hopefully it just continues to get better and better. I could be outside all day long even now and it is still in the 90's.
3.) Coming across cute baby things such as these two items I saw in PB catalog. I have loved this chair for awhile... I think it is one of their best sellers. I am just such a sucker for neutrals. Even once we know the gender, I think I will still want neutrals.

Anyways, that is the latest. I have appointment on Tuesday with my doctor. Thoughts and prayers appreciated that things continue to look great.

Today I am 12 weeks

 

Which means in two weeks I will be over the first trimester! I really have no complaints at all about how I have felt over the last several weeks and would say I have had a fairly easy pregnancy thus far. I do still take zofran but usually only need half the dose about once a day. It is very effective and I have not felt sick at all really since taking it. I feel tired sometimes but considering I work nights, fatigue really isn't an issue. I do not realize when I am being emotional or feisty but Forrest, in a very sensitive way of course, has told me he has noticed. 

Food is a strange thing. I guess you could say I have some food cravings and aversions...something either sounds good or it doesn't sound good at all. Usually things that sounds good are fruits, sweets, breads, and cereals. But then again these were all some of my favorite things before being pregnant. Two things I used to love and eat/drink almost on a daily basis were dark chocolate covered raisins and Starbucks coffees. Proof that pregnancy changes your appetite are that I have not been in the mood for either of these things one bit. I used to buy two bags of the raisins that would last me/us one week and as stingy as I was with them every night after dinner, Forrest cannot believe that my addiction has just suddenly disappeared. Coffee used to be one of my favorite things and again, I just have not been up for it. Nope, not even a Starbucks unfortunately. I am hoping my love for them will come back, considering all the fun holiday drinks are coming out. 

As you can see in the picture, I do have a little belly. Pants are a little snug and tight fitting shirts are not really an option. This picture is only descent because you know I am pregnant; however walking around in public I just look like I have a gut. With that said, until I can pull off the pregnant look, looks like it will be baggy clothes only for now!

Anyways, that is an update on me. I will blog soon about my next appointment which is set for Sept. 27th. I will be at 14 weeks by then....definitely something to celebrate. :)

Second Sonogram: 10 weeks

We had our second sonogram at about 10 weeks. Everything continues to look great according to the doctor. She had a hard time getting a good angle for the picture but when she finally did, it turned out cute. This time you could actually tell there was a little baby in there. We were proud so once again, we took a family pic.

First Sonogram

Luckily, just as soon as I started to feel sick in the mornings, I was only days away from having my first appointment with Dr. Bertsch, my OBGYN. I waited it out and thankfully during that time I had had a long stretch of days off work. Although I have no complaints now, it was pretty awful at the time. I am sure fellow mommy's understand the misery of waking up around 4am to hover your head over the toilet and vomit uncontrollably the nothing that is left in your stomach. For those few days, 4 to be exact, I would just go sleep in the other room to avoid going back and forth to our bedroom waking up Forrest at the worst time in the morning, right before he has to really get up for work. He was so sweet about it, always asking if I was okay, and coming into the other bedroom to lay with me anyways.

The morning of my appointment, I am not sure if I was more excited about getting our first sonogram or getting a prescription for zofran. It was truly a close call. Forrest met me at the doctor's office and of course was with me the whole time. We started the appointment with a discussion on how I have been feeling followed by the moment I had been dreaming for... seeing the doctor pull out her prescription pad. One step closer to getting that darn zofran. Next we just discussed different things, medical history, family history, first trimester, what to expect, diet, do's and don'ts, etc. Then she had me get on the table, undress from waist down, for the dreadful transvaginal ultrasound. Boy do I look forward to the days we don't have to do those anymore. Uncomfortable, but well worth it. The first sonogram experience was truly a milestone. It was a moment where I realized I could really call myself pregnant as silly as that sounds given all the other clues. I guess peeing on a stick is just not that exciting and validating to me and regardless, there is nothing as reassuring as hearing a tiny, miraculous little heart beat.... at barely 7 weeks.

Overall, my appointment went well. Working in labor and delivery, I am already familiar with the OBGYN's in this area including Dr. Bertsch, so it was nice getting to sit down with a familiar face and with someone who I have seen her work and already trust. Overall the ultrasound went well. The doctor said everything looked perfect. I can't wait until the next ultrasound to see how much he/she has grown and to just make sure all is still okay. We are already proud of the little dot on the sonogram picture, knowing it doesn't look like much now, but that it is the start of something very big for us.

Telling Forrest then Telling Family

Forrest and I went to dinner the night I found out I was pregnant. I tried to think of maybe a creative way to tell him, or special place I could take him. Instead, I kept it a secret and just thought maybe the right time would just come. We go eat at our favorite hole in the wall restaurant in Hempstead, really the only place to eat. On our way there I was silent, a change for me so of course Forrest noticed. He asked me if everything was okay and I said yes but could not look him in the eyes. We go inside, sit down, and immediately our waitress brings us chips and salsa. We start eating and I realize that I am so anxious, I physically cannot swallow a chip. My heart was racing. I was without a doubt having at least a mild panic attack. I could not find any words to say much less those important ones I needed to.

After devouring several chips, Forrest eventually looked up from the table and realized I was just not myself (mainly because I was not devouring chips too). From there I don't know what happened, really, somehow it came out of my mouth as he asked what's wrong. Although I can't remember exactly what I said, I am a little glad I did not have a camera to document it all. The greater memories came later after coming home and talking about it. The shock was just so much and at a restaurant and out of no where! Wish I could say it was one of those moments where we were both overjoyed with tears or jumping up from the table with excitement, but no that is not the case.

Having said that, things took a turn later that night and even more so as the days went by. We came to a point where we were both over the initial shock and more focused on being excited. Forrest even came home a couple days later with a Babies R Us catalog, then plopped down on the couch to go through it. 

So... to sum up Forrest's reaction with two pictures: The first represents his initial reaction...

Then later that night, he became more like this:

The next day I called my Sister and my parents to tell them. It was my Sister's birthday and they were enjoying a day out on the beach. She was so thrilled and so proud. She said it was the best birthday present she could ask for. My Mom cried, then she balled. My dad was excited but I think not too happy with me because they were in Iowa visiting his family and I told him not to tell anyone. He is not the greatest secret keeper, but he did me proud on this one.

Then that night, we told Forrest's parents. We were going to take them out to dinner to celebrate but they had started some projects on the ranch. I knew I was going to see Cheri all day on Monday (we had a girls' outing planned) and there was no way I was going to be able to keep it from her. So we interrupted their evening anyways to tell them. They were both super excited. Something so neat about this moment was that Forrest's dad said he was on his tractor earlier that day, and he had this feeling that something was about to change in their lives. He thought to himself, "I know what it is... Bubba and Moof are going to have a baby." Then, can you believe it, we broke the news to them that very night. 

Taking a Moment

So as soon as I say this, it is going to be obvious what this blog is about. Especially since it is something that we have been asked about for the last four years, understandably. Anyways, here goes.
So today marks the day that I am one week late. After being several days late, I told myself I would wait until one full week before taking a pregnancy test but I couldn’t help myself. I took one 3 days ago and the test was negative.

I had mixed thoughts about the idea of being pregnant after taking that test. I was relieved. Then I felt guilty for feeling relieved . I couldn’t help but think about all of the couples who try for years and finally do, or in some cases never do. Then I started to feel scared, like what if we are one of those couples or what if there is something wrong with me, and I cannot have children. What if it is my fault. Hopefully all these thoughts are normal, I really do not want to allow myself to get anxious about things in life.

There was a side of me that was disappointed, honestly. I guess I am more ready than I realize. The thought of moving on to the next chapter, taking that next step is really exciting. We know what a big decision it is to have a child and are really more ready now than we have ever been in our marriage. I have thought for a long time that the  idea would be to have the timing all planned out but as time goes by, I realize that trying to plan is stressful. We could always have more money, a bigger house, cars and things paid off, we will always have a wedding coming up or trip we wanted to go on. There will always be something. And the thought of it just happening felt kind of nice. Like a weight lifted off our shoulders and a reminder that God is in control.

So that was a few days ago. Yesterday, I still had not started so I took the second test that came in the package. Waited and waited, seeing just this tiny faint line next to a big bold red line. It even seemed to flicker at first. I wasn’t sure of what to think and I knew I needed to get ready for work. I set it under the bathroom counter, hiding it. I went on to work, a little in denial that that was a positive result. Tried not to think about it at work, but remember where I work? Labor and delivery. My patient that day was a 22 yo 17 week gestation, IUFD which means intrauterine fetal demise. I really bonded with her, sympathizing so much more with her and realizing how sad she must be. I deliver living babies so much more than ones that didn’t make it and after a while, you start to forget what a little miracle it is for everything to go right.

After work, I stopped by HEB on the way home to get another box of tests. I did not take it right away, believe it or not I was that tired that I just wanted to go straight to sleep! I woke up about an hour ago, went straight to the bathroom to take a test. Result was positive.

I have an annual OBGYN appt this week (how perfect on the timing, right?) so I guess I will know more of an answer then. I cannot wait until then to tell Forrest, I have no idea how to tell him. He is my husband and best friend, and never ever have I been so anxious about telling him something. This trumps all those times I spent too much money on something and had to tell him or else he would see it on our statement. Ha ha. Anyways, he is working outside with his dad on the fence. I thought I better take a moment now to gather my thoughts and figure out what I am going to say before he comes inside…